Penalty v. tax

GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney says the Affordable Health Care Act's mandate is a tax.

President Barack Obama calls its enforcement provisions a penalty.

It's a tax.

It's a penalty.

It's a tax.

It's a penalty.

It's a tax.

Oh, stop it. Aren't all taxes penalties? And, for what it's worth, Certs was a breath mint.

Not black enough?

Morgan Freeman has one of the best, most recognizable voices in Hollywood. The words that come out of his mouth always sound amazing, even if what he says is totally from another planet.

In an interview with NPR, Freeman expressed his opinion about Barack Obama's heritage, saying that he's not black enough to be America's first black president.

"Barack had a mama and she was white, very white American, Kansas, middle of America," Freeman said. He later added, "America's first black president hasn't arisen yet. ... (Obama) is America's first mixed-race president."

Freeman also criticized the Republican Party for "purposely" thwarting Obama.

Morgan, how about sticking to words that other people write for you?

Something from the oven

In keeping with a 20-year-long tradition, first lady Michelle Obama and FLOTUS hopeful Ann Romney ripped off their oven mitts last week to compete in an illuminating alternative to the traditional Gallup poll: Family Circle magazine's Presidential Cookie Bake-Off.

Apparently there are prophetic political truths to be learned from this high-stakes cookie competition: Every Presidential Cookie Bake-Off winner (with the exception of Cindy McCain) subsequently secured the coveted seat in the East Wing.

Furthermore, trend analysis of the bake-off's previous winning recipes reveals a critical secret ingredient: good, old-fashioned oats.

But despite losing to McCain in 2008 with a shortbread recipe, the first lady has once again thumbed her nose at the oat-favoring precedent by presenting a dark and white chocolate chip recipe.

What's more, the first lady chose a doozy of a fat source in the form of butter-flavored Crisco, which -- despite a recent trans-fat-free overhaul -- is sure to turn off some voters who associate shortening with a cholesterol catastrophe.

But who's counting calories, right, Michelle? It's the electoral votes that count.

Beeeeeleeeeeeeeeeve!

Mitt Romney will now have some unlikely advertising from outside the campaign. An anonymous donor is paying for a minor-league soccer club, F.C. New York, to wear jerseys with the candidate's name and slogan "Believe in America."

The jerseys come in pink and white.

For some reason, pink and white don't seem too presidential. Black and white stripes seem more appropriate.

He's batty about Batman

Sen. Patrick Leahy of Vermont is making a cameo appearance in "The Dark Knight Rises," which gets its first public showing July 15 in his home state.

Leahy was invited to be in the movie and says he'll appear in a scene with Christian Bale, who plays Batman, and Morgan Freeman.

The Democratic senator, long fascinated with the Caped Crusader, also appeared in "The Dark Knight" in 2007.

And you wonder what's wrong with Washington?